Dear Dairy
Moosetta was no ordinary teenage cow. For one, she had a penchant for introspection that set her apart from the herd. While her bovine peers spent their days ruminating on grass and gossiping about Farmer Ted's questionable overalls, Moosetta dreamed of expressing herself. So, one day, she picked up a pen (a challenge without opposable thumbs, but determination prevailed) and started her journal, Dear Dairy . Day 1 Dear Dairy, Today, Betsy said I chew my cud like I'm in a Shakespearean tragedy. That's udderly unfair. If contemplating existence while chewing is a crime, then lock me up. Also, I caught Farmer Ted sneaking cookies behind the barn. He dropped one. It was chocolate chip. A win for me, a loss for his waistline. Day 3 Dear Dairy, I've decided that I want to write poetry. Here's my first attempt: The pasture green, the sun does gleam, My moo unheard, a bovine dream. It needs work, but the chickens seemed impressed. Except for Cluck Norris—he's always s...